“Pain is Like a Gaseous Substance…”

“Our emotional suffering is caused by our desire for things to be other than they are.

The more we resist the fact of what is happening right now, the more we suffer.

Pain is like a gaseous substance. If you allow it to just be there, freely, it will eventually dissipate on its own.

If you fight and resist the pain, however, walling it into a confined space, the pressure will grow and grow until there is an explosion.”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 94.

“Self-Compassion Has Three Distinct Doorways In…”

“The beauty of using self-compassion as a tool for dealing with difficult emotions is that it has three distinct doorways in…

Whenever you notice you are in pain, you have three potential courses of action:

*You can give yourself kindness and care

*You can remind yourself that encountering pain is part of the shared human experience

*You can hold your thoughts and emotions in mindful awareness”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 102.

“Self-Appreciation and Self-Compassion Are Really Two Sides of the Same Coin…”

“Self-appreciation and self-compassion are really two sides of the same coin…

One is focused on what brings us pleasure, the other on what brings us suffering.

One celebrates our strength as humans, the other accepts our weaknesses.”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 282.

“Savoring is Like a Glass of Good Wine…”

“Savoring refers to the conscious enjoyment of that which gives us pleasure;

that is, lingering over delightful experiences, swishing them around in our awareness like a glass of good wine.”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 279.

“Happy Needs to Be Balanced By Sadness…”

“Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness,

and the word happy would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness…”

–Carl Jung

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 257.

“We Can Start To Pursue Our Dreams…”

“Because self-compassion makes us feel safe, centered, and connected, we can delight in what’s wonderful about our lives rather than dwelling solely on problems and limitations…

We can start to pursue our dreams rather than merely ward off dangers.”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 255.

“Positive Psychology…”

“Generally known as the “positive psychology” movement, its focus is on understanding the factors that lead to mental health rather than mental illness…”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 255.

“Negative Emotions Tend to Narrow Our Attention…”

“…Negative emotions tend to narrow our attention so much that we miss the obvious and make mistakes, meaning that we cause ourselves extra stress and problems…

…Positive emotions, on the other hand, tend to broaden our attention so that we notice useful details and have creative ideas, meaning that we maximize our thinking, decision-making abilities, and coping skills.”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 253.

“When One Door of Happiness Closes…”

“When one door of happiness closes, another opens, but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one that has been opened for us.”

–Helen Keller

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. P. 250.

“Tight Clamp of Negativity…”

“Not only does self-compassion open our hearts, it also opens our minds, releasing our perceptions from the tight clamp of negativity…

When we’re lost in negative judgment, our awareness automatically narrows in on what’s wrong with ourselves and our lives. We only see the blemish of imperfection, taking for granted the beauty and wonder of the bigger picture.”

Neff, Kristin. (2011). Self-Compassion: Stop beating yourself up and leave insecurity behind. New York, NY: Harper Collins. p. 250.